Am I mentally A Good Kid, is My Personality alright?

Hey Low I'm Gage, and I'm 15 years old, I Cut myself (Reasons reserved for the people who gain my trust) I'm a quiet person, I don't talk much, I don't like to be the center of attention, I'm writing a book, I like to be a Voice actor when I get older, but I don't really like my voice, but I'm in an Alpha and Omega Full Movie Fandub With Youtuber milkshakedreams123. The main reasons why I like to make friends is that I like to study what they talk about, and what they're reactions are (Good, or Bad) and sometimes I like to cause them, and I like to crack them open a see what they're like, and If I like them they can be Apart of my Pack (Yet again Gain my trust for further details on that) if I'm bored, or not interested in their particular personality I tend to not care about them, or just not be around, or be their friend. I have Major Trust issues, You really have to earn my trust for me to tell you Everything. I Basically Hate all Humans, and Hate to even be a Human. Thought of Suicide a couple of times, just don't have the guts to do it, but I always invite Death, and if I get in serious trouble, and I need pain medicine before I die I would refuse it, I want to die slowly, and painfully, (to me it feels like a more purposeful death) BUT I'm goofy, and happy(ish) when I want to be, and can be, I Skateboard, Tennis, Soccer, I love Music, I love Animated Movies, My Favorite Song is The Stand by Monty Are I, I love my Dogs, but life to me feels meaningless compared to the Life I yearn for........ If you want to crack me open and see all the Serious stuff I believe in then my E-mail is mr.bishopga1@yahoo.com I'm Always open to conversations, but beware they could be weird for you <.<